Reflections a year later

It's been a year since I left for Mali. I still think about Mali, and the people I met there more than I care to admit. In commemoration of the trip, I've decided to begin posting again on this blog. Reading through my journals I discovered many stories to share, many experiences to expand on. This blog is now becoming more my way to reflect on my experiences there.
To begin, I would like to start with my first journal entry, from the night before I left, and my thoughts on looking back on it now.

12/28 – New York

I can’t believe I leave for Africa tomorrow. It’s so unreal. I know it’s going to be incredible, but I’m really getting nervous and kind of starting to doubt my decision. What if I don’t adapt well? What if I get a bad host family? What if I get sick? Miss my family? Make a mistake? Don’t fit in? Don’t like it? I’m glad I brought a couple of little comfort items, just in case. Albert’s been great to have so far, and I’m sure he’ll come in handy again. Here’s hoping I read my itinerary right and don’t have any issues with my flight tomorrow!

Albert definitely came in handy on this trip. I slept with him every night, and many times, he was a great comfort to have. Having one small comfort item like him was really helpful, especially near the beginning of the trip. Also, Malian pillows were pretty terrible. It was nice to have a good pillow that I brought with me.

It’s funny looking back at these “what ifs” I had at the beginning of the trip:

What if I don’t adapt well?

I feel like I was able to adapt well, but it definitely took a while. In the long run though, I definitely didn’t need to worry about this.

           What if I get a bad host family?

My host family was definitely not the most important part of the trip for me, but that doesn’t mean they were a bad host family. They were all really nice people, but were just really busy, and worked a lot. While there were times when I wished I had a family that was around more, and was a bigger part of my experience, I think one of the biggest reasons I was able to adapt so well was that I had that alone time that I know I need to process what’s happening in my life. It might also have contributed to why I was so willing to talk to random strangers on the street, which was definitely the biggest highlight of the trip. All in all, I think I got the right host family for me.

           What if I get sick?

I did get sick a couple of times, but neither was all that serious, and didn’t really present a problem in the overall trip. Even when eating street food, and drinking tap water by the end of the trip, I never got seriously sick.

           Miss my family?

I definitely missed my family, but not any more than any other Carleton term. It’s also true however, that I always looked forward to calling home and talking to them more so than I normally do. Not that I don’t enjoy talking to my parents, but while in Mali, having someone who was not in the country, who was not on the program to talk to and get some perspective from was really invaluable in the continued adaptation process.

           Make a mistake?

I definitely made a lot of mistakes, but I didn’t need to worry about that. Malians apparently don’t really have a word for embarrassment, and that sentiment doesn’t even cross their minds. Sure they laugh at you when you say something wrong in Bambara, or are just there and white, but it was never in a malicious way.

           Don’t fit in?

I think my worry with not fitting in was more with the group than with the culture. It was pretty apparent from the moment we stepped off the plane that there was no way we’d be able to blend into Malian society. And my fears of not fitting into the group were also unfounded. They are an amazing group of people who I have the pleasure of now calling friends.

           Don’t like it?

This was something I definitely did not need to worry about. I fell in love with Mali. With the people, the culture, the language…as an American we met there said: once you come to Mali it gets it’s claws in you, and you’ll always come back.

WOOO AFRICA!!

Apologies for how apparently awful I am at blogging...and for what will, I'm sure, will be another marathon post, as it's been about 3 weeks since the last one.

For those of you that want the short version:

It's really challenging here, but I wouldn't trade this experience for the world. I've very quickly fallen in love with the people, the culture, and the place. I'm already beginning to dread the day when the trip ends, and I have to head home.

For those of you that want the very short version:

WOOOOOO AFRICA!!!!!

For those of you that want the long version:

I'm definitely finally settling into the rhythm of life here. Wake up, walk 20 minutes to Haley and Julian's, stopping along the way to talk to my security guard friends that work along the way, walk 20 minutes to the sotrama stop, yell at people in bambara to try to find the right one, get in the back of a gutted out VW van with 20 other people, repeatedly tell the apprenti (who doesn't speak french) what stop we're getting out at, and pray that he actually hits the van so the driver stops there, yell at him when he doesn't, walk 10 minutes to school. Go to class, eat lunch, try to hail a sotrama to get to Cherif's for dance by hailing another sotrama, hope it goes to the right place, walk to Cherif's from the sotrama stop, dance or play the djembe for 2 hours, try to hail a taxi because it's late and we don't want to take the 2 hours to get home, have the taxi driver quote us some ridiculously high price, negotiate him down to the actual price (in Bambara), get dropped off at Haley and Julian's, walk 20 minutes home. Oof. On days we don't have dance, we take a sotrama to the grand marché, about an hour walk from Haley and Julian's, and quite an experience every time. We stand out quite a lot, being the only white people there, and are constantly bombarded by vendors trying to sell us items, at vastly inflated prices, of course.

Even that long-winded explanation of life here doesn't do it justice. Saying hi to everyone you pass in the street, trash everywhere, small children yelling "toubabu!" as you walk by, people drinking tea, selling fruit, washing clothes, dodging piles of trash, open sewers, push carts, motos, sotramas, people, cars...there's just  so much going on all the time! But never so much that people won't stop to greet you and invite you to sit and drink tea with them. Never so much that people are not friendly and welcoming.

This trip so far has definitely been really challenging in a lot of ways. Always sticking out wherever we go, never blending in, much lower standards of living and sanitation, lots of walking, still not really knowing what's really culturally acceptable, and what we're just given a pass on because we're foreigners, and so many others. That being said though, I would not exchange this experience for the world. I love how friendly people are here, and how easy it is to talk to them. I'm starting to learn bambara and love to watch people's faces light up when you know say even the smallest phrases to them in it. Even how they laugh at you when it becomes quite apparent that, no, you can't actually speak bambara. I find myself looking forward to my walk home every day, in anticipation of the people I'll see, and the potential conversations I'll have. About a week ago, I ended up having a religious debate with some random man on the street for almost an hour, precipitated simply by the fact that I said hi to him. It was truly fascinating! I find myself wishing that people in the US would be as open as people here a lot.

I'm not going to have time, and I'm sure you won't want to read about everything that's happened in the last 3 weeks, so I'll give some highlights.

Highlight 1: The people. I know that's a super broad topic, but I've had the opportunity to meet so many amazing people in the last 3 weeks, it's a little ridiculous. Whether it's the security guard I pass who gets a huge smile on his face every time I walk by, the drivers who took us to Kita, the pool cleaner I talked to for 3 hours, the aforementioned man I debated religion with, or any number of others, the people of Mali are definitely some of the friendliest, nicest, most open people I've met.

Highlight 2: Cherif seems to know everyone here, and this allows us to have some incredible opportunities. We've had the chance to have 2 private concerts, each with famous Malian musicians, meet all the important families and the Imams of Kita, a world-famous photographer, a world-famous sculptor, and so many more. It's almost gotten to the point where meeting famous/important people has become a norm, and it'll be hard to adjust back to life in America where that's not as possible.

Highlight 3: I've gotten to know my host brother really well, thanks to a 3 hour, 8 mile trek across most of Bamako a couple of weeks ago. It really provided the opportunity I needed to get past the initial getting to know you stages to actual friendship with him. He's definitely the member of my host family I'm closest to, and  I spend a lot of my time at the house talking with him. I'm hoping that soon I can become as close with my sisters as well, but am finding it harder to do so.

Highlight 4: Marriage proposals. While also a little weird, and kind of intimidating, I've come to really enjoy the marriage proposals, as I know they don't expect anything to come of them. It's a little flattering when someone you just meet asks you to marry them, despite knowing that it's just because you're white, and they want to use you as a ticket out of Mali. Slightly less fun are they guys that ask you for your number. It's hard to know how to say no without giving offense. So far my record for marriage proposals in a day is 2, and for people asking for my number is 3.

Highlight 5: I've really been diving into trying to learn bambara, and have been really enjoying it. I'm taking extra lessons, and have started understanding the structure of the language, and am able to have short conversations in bambara with people, as long as they speak really slowly and enunciate a lot. I had a great personal victory yesterday when I bought bananas completely in bambara, and was given an extra banana by the lady selling them. Doesn't sound like much, I know, but was a great step for me.

Obviously I can't highlight everything that happened, and truth be told, I'm saving all my best stories for a more personal setting, but I hope this gives you a little taste of my life here.

Adjusting

First, I suppose I should reintroduce myself. Hello! My name is Aisha Deyoko. I've now been in Mali for about a week, and am still adapting to life here. It's definitely really from life back home, or anywhere else I've ever been. I apologize in advance for what will probably be a marathon post, but so much has happened in the past 2 weeks or so since my last post, I'm going to have a hard time keeping it short. Also, sorry there are no photos, my internet connections too slow for me to feasibly be able to post any right now. I'll try again next post.

Almost 2 weeks ago now, on December 26th, I finished some last minute packing, said goodbye to Juan, Hugh, and my parents, and left Eugene, headed for my first destination, New York City. I spent about 3 days there, thanks to Harper and her family's generosity, both in opening their home to me and providing me with an awesome tour guide in Harper. We did tons of touristy things, ate expensive food, saw the Book of Mormon on Broadway after standing in the rain for 3 hours for tickets, and of course, ate a lot of delicious, overpriced food. December 29th, I said my goodbyes to my generous hosts and headed to JFK to meet the rest of the group. Now the real adventure was beginning! And what an adventure it's been.

I'm going to try to give an abridged version of what I've done here so far, but if you want to know more, feel free to let me know. After a long day and  a half or so of travel, we finally arrived in Bamako, the capital of Mali. We stayed with our group for the first few days, until the 4th of January. Our second night we welcomed the New Year with cocacola, pineapple soda, sprite, a quick dip in the pool for some, and fireworks. It was really calm, but nice too.

We took a day to tour around the city a little bit, and on our third morning in Mali we headed off to our first village, Siby. I made my first Malian friend here, a local guy named Fama Kamara. He showed me around the hotel compound we were staying in, including the crocodile and porcupine, and we talked a lot about differences in our education systems (he's 22, and in his last year of high school), and a bunch of other stuff. It was great to be able to practice my french a bit, because as a group, we pretty much speak exclusively in english. He found out I There were also some Malians slacklining at the hotel, which was really cool to see. I had no idea that was a thing outside of the US. I tried it out, but being in a different country did nothing to improve my slacklining abilities. We also got our first taste of african dance here, with a dance in Siby that night. We all got up and gave it a shot. It seems as though the Malians really enjoyed watcing us Toubabs (as they call westerners) dance, despite most of us being pretty bad, myself included. But we all had fun, which is the important thing. Earlier in the day, we went to a natural arch near the village, which is a sacred site in their traditional religion.

The next day, we headed to Nane-keneba, the village Cherif's dad was from. Before going there though, we went and saw a waterfall, which was absolutely beautiful. After we left there, and about a 2 hour drive down bumpy, unpaved, dirt roads, we arrived in the village and were immediately surrounded by a whole bunch of kids. It was kind ly of cool, but honest mostly just pretty overwhelming. They would kind of hiss at us to get our attention, then pose for pictures. They were pretty demanding of our time and attention. It was hard because we all felt like we wanted to do something for them, because it was pretty obvious that their standard of living was so much lower than ours, but didn't know how to do so without giving them everything. I talked for a long time with Dragoess, who is a Malian who teaches in France and comes to Mali every two years to help with the program, teaching our Malian film course. We talked a lot about the infrastructure of Mali, the school systems, politics, poverty...I won't go into details about it here, but suffice it to say that Mali as a country is not doing very well. We went to another Malian dance that night, but this one was more traditional, in that they performed some dances with masks and costumes and such during it. Whenever we got up to dance, all of the small children would laugh at us, so I'm sure we looked pretty ridiculous, but to our credit, we went for it with a vengeance. The next morning we visited the school, medical clinic, and blacksmith in town, then headed back to Siby for lunch and Bamako to meet our host families.

My host family is great. They have 4 kids, who are 14, 21, 23, and 25. All the older ones, and both of the parents, work, which seems to be really uncommon here. The dad, oldest brother,  younger sister are all architects, the older sister is a civil engineer, the mom, a dentist. They're all super nice, and all speak great french, which is really nice, and surprisingly uncommon here. French is really not that widely spoken here. You will barely hear any french spoken anywhere here. When my host sisters are out with friends, they speak Bambara too, so I just stand by and observe. It's certainly interesting being somewhere where I don't speak the popular language, but I'm getting by and slowly learning some Bambara along the way. I went to a wedding the first day with my family, which was nothing like weddings here, but mostly consisted of me preparing some food and not understanding what was happening around me, as everyone only spoke in Bambara. I did, however, get my first marriage proposition from a cousin, which was interesting. He was joking around of course, but it's hard to know how to respond to that. Since then, I've had a great taxi adventure getting to Point Sud, where we're having classes, my first experience at a tailor, eaten fish with its head, fins, skin, everything intact...

I guess that's, if you can believe it, a super abridged version of life here so far. If you want me to elaborate on anything or have any questions, leave a comment, and I'll be happy to reply in my next post.

Andy: Hope your trip back to school was uneventful, and I hope you have a great winter term!
Mom and Dad: Have fun in Mexico! I'll talk to you when you get back.
1hue: Miss you guys! Hope you're having a great winter term, and I can't wait to see you all come spring term.